The New Rules

To: Myself
From: Me
CC: My Friends and Family

  1. No clothes are worth pay­ing tons of money on. You are going to ruin them at some point anyway.
  2. Don’t buy any more thumb dri­ves. Any file too big to SSH to your home PC isn’t worth putting on a USB drive you will likely lose, destroy, or wash in the wash­ing machine. Burn a CD.
  3. Stop buy­ing nice pens. You leave them in your pock­ets and wash them in the wash­ing machine, destroy­ing them and all of your clothes.
  4. Stop feel­ing guilty about everything
  5. Get more sleep.
  6. Read more, you like it.
  7. Cheer the fuck up, you mis­er­able piece of crap.
  8. Play more music. You like that too.
  9. Keep all pens, thumb dri­ves, CDs, clothes, food, and books you need to read in the gigan­tic mes­sen­ger bag you com­plaint about never filling.
  10. Cease and desist all gen­eral para­noid day­dream­ing about unusu­ally hor­ri­ble things hap­pen­ing to you and your loved ones. Your fam­ily doesn’t even know you do this, it’s bet­ter to just quit it and avoid the ther­apy down the road.
  11. Stop stay­ing up until 1 AM mak­ing dumb self-help lists.
Tuesday August 14, 2007 – 11:52 pm | By Justin | Posted in General | Comments (9)

9 Comments

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